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A woman can choose to wear clothes more suitable for girls her age and maturity. Too often I see young teenagers wearing clothes that could best be described as “come have sex with me tonight” or “I’m easy” or “slutty”. This is a cultural issue. I have seen girls that look not more than 14 years old like this. Hello Mom & Dad this is where you’re supposed to speak up and just say “NO, you’re definitely not wearing that”. Be firm. It’s been said that males have only one thing on their mind most of the time. Why tempt fate? I never understood those people who let their children dress “sexy”. For what purpose are they doing this, to procreate? To just have sex, really a child? A child dress sexy, why on earth would you tolerate that? If it’s to get attention, that is really sad. There are better ways to get attention. You can be attractive without being sexual suggestive. I understand that humans need to have sex. I understand it’s basic however a human being has to be mature enough to accept the responsibilities that go with having sex.
A society lacking grace and afraid of intimacy spells trouble
I was waiting at the traffic light today to take our daughter to the doctor’s office and there in front of me was a jacked up pick-up truck with a twenty-something guy wearing a cowboy hat. Country music could be heard coming from his speakers and there pasted on his back window in prominent view of everyone was the message “Porn…It’s cheaper than dating.” I suppose he thought it was funny. My daughter was unfazed by it, but frankly I was embarrassed and more than a little annoyed muttering “loser” a little too loud perhaps. Cowboys of legend and John Wayne must be rolling in their graves, if this guy is the epitome of the modern cowboy.
I suppose some will say this bumper sticker is tame by today’s standards; however I would argue there are no standards and that is indeed the problem. In society’s rush to tolerate and accept everything and everybody, good taste and decency have been thrown under the bus and replaced by the most shocking, crude, prurient communication dreamed up. Nothing apparently gets censored anymore. Everything gets a pass; all is acceptable for consumption. When did this happen? Will this young man a few years from now feel the same way about exercising his first amendment right to free speech when his eight or ten year old daughter asks him what is Porn. I wonder will she already know what Porn is? Will she already be influenced by it at some level as the culture reaches new levels of depravity? Just how decadent can American society become if we put our minds to it?
Maybe this “cowboy” truly believes dating’s only purpose is to get physically intimate. “Hooking up” is what some people are calling it these days but that is definitely not dating. Porn maybe offers him an easy short cut to self-gratification. The trouble is Porn never satisfies. How incredibly sad it must be for him, if dating is only about self-gratification. What about taking an interest in your fellow human being that you’re attracted to. Why not try and get to know them intimately through conversation first and time well spent together. That’s what the purpose of dating is supposed to be, and that takes a lot of effort, but most relationships of value do take effort. A human being has to invest in a person physically, emotionally, spiritually, and monetarily if they are going to love them. It’s going “all in” as they say in poker. That’s risky and requires patience but it’s worth it. My marriage of twenty-four years is proof of that.
Like every other electronic gadget and gizmo that has dehumanized society these days, Porn is now very high tech and I guess to some socially & sexually hungry human beings its promise of a quick fix is not unlike a drug that creates addiction. I would argue it’s cheating them of the true pleasure and romance in dating and creating instead intimacy problems for them in the future.
Don’t judge me man. That’s what I hear some of you reading this are saying. That’s what my kids tell me too when I have a critical comment to make about the clothes they wear, their appearance or manners. Don’t judge, really? This is the message being taught to the youth today. Well guess what, the world does judge you and me and everyone else. Whether you like it or not, whether you think it’s fair or not, it’s a fact of life and the older you get the more you realize that prejudices and judgments exist. Everyday human beings make first impressions with their fellow human beings, and things like physical attractiveness, clothes, smells, grooming, speech, intelligence all play a role in making that first impression.
If you don’t think people judge you by appearance or actions, or you say well I’m not a judgmental person, think again and be honest. Ask yourself what you would think of a daycare provider who was watching kiddie Porn on their computer the moment you walked in to leave your kids with them. Or perhaps you need a good lawyer because your wife is divorcing you because you believe Porn is cheaper than paying attention to her. When you get to the lawyer’s office he’s dressed in pajamas sitting on his desk smoking a doobie, with a Twinkie in his other hand. Are you going to hire him? Don’t tell me you don’t judge people. We all do. It is human nature and we are hard wired to be discerning.
So why then if impressions do count and we know people judge us, do some continue to flaunt their dark side in public. Do they just simply not care or do they just not know any better? Those from the generation whose motto was “if it feels good, do it” must really be proud. For feeling good seems to be what their offspring are into these days. More and more of American society seems to exhibit this kind of detachment from their fellow human beings. Crude and rude behavior toward others is becoming more the norm instead of the rare occasion. Texting has substituted physical conversation. In person office communication to address concerns is avoided and replaced by electronic mail communication. Intimacy is replaced with pornography. Marriage is replaced with live in arrangements or “friendship with benefits”. Recognize the trend?
Just how prepared do you think this coming generation is for the tough times ahead of us if they are afraid of criticism, refuse to be held accountable or judged by their actions, and are afraid of physical human interaction and true intimacy ? How easily will they be manipulated by a government that tracks all of their electronic communication now?
Today’s American society lacks social grace and has definite intimacy issues. People of the baby boomer and my generation “the x generation”, I think have failed the youth of today in their responsibilities with their selfishness, and complacent attitudes. We failed to model that which our fathers and grandfathers did without even trying. We all can and should do a better job at being fathers and mothers, business people and leaders of our families and communities. It all starts with the man in the mirror.
Excellence is a…
Excellence is an art won by training and habituation.
We do not act rightly because we have virtue or
excellence, but we rather have those because we have
acted rightly. We are what we repeatedly do.
Excellence, then, is not an act but a habit.
Aristotle (384 BC – 322 BC)
America is suffering from a case of multiple personality disorder
I had a discussion the other day with someone who identified themselves as Libertarian and was promoting the idea of legalizing marijuana nationwide. While I identify with many Libertarian viewpoints I draw a line when it comes to their views on social issues and I took issue with my friend’s points. When you get down to it both Libertarians as well as those from the left of the political center embrace the idea that man is inherently good and that if only the right set of laws were put in place or the elimination of laws as in the case of Libertarians man would be happy place and be able to live in harmony or paradise on Earth. Conservatives by contrast and particularly Christian ones do not believe in the inherent goodness of man. Instead they recognize that man is corruptible from the moment of birth. I identify more I think with this belief and accept as our founders did that with great freedom comes great responsibility. Men are not angels and so laws are needed in some cases to govern human beings whose very nature is corruptible.
The libertarian mantra that everyone should be able to do whatever they want whenever they want to, and believe whatever they want to, so long as it does not hurt others is often being preached these days. We see them more and more in social networking circles and increasingly in the political arena. Like their left wing political rivals they believe that truth is subjective and changing, and morality can best be described as relative. This idea is gaining traction now too as more public schools are teaching young people to accept everyone and every culture and giving equal merit to all beliefs all the while ridiculing the Bible’s interpretation of creation and man’s purpose on Earth.
The conflict as I see it or some would say the “cultural war” is the fact that America’s heritage is not based on moral relativity; multi-culturalism; multi-lingualism; worship of the State, or hedonism. American culture, laws and customs have their roots in the Judeo-Christian experience and the belief in one true God; the acceptance of absolute truth and the natural laws of men. John Adams said “Our constitution was made only for a moral and religious people. It is wholly inadequate to the government of any other”. I agree. It was expected from the outset that citizenship should be taken seriously. It was hoped that citizens would be honest in their dealing with one another; sober; informed and able to exercise sound judgment and fiscal and social responsibility. These things were deemed necessary in order to maintain self-governance. However, fast forward to today’s society and what you have is a population of people addicted to their own passions and pleasures, ignoring their responsibilities and increasingly reliant upon government to provide for them. An increasing number of Americans reject or ignore their heritage and common language English; and millions of immigrants now are permitted to enter the country without ever being required to assimilate to the American culture but are willing to take from American sustenance. It is not sustainable, to use the language of the political left. Rome and many other empires of antiquity were destroyed in this way.
America does not have a state religion but if it did it most certainly would be Christian, as in poll after poll a majority of Americans still identify themselves as Christian. The numbers depending upon the polls hover around 75%. What can be said of a population that stands for and is tolerant of everything? Are they not by default then really standing for nothing? Furthermore what can be said of American society that claims to be Christian but increasingly is silent to pop culture’s embrace of moral relativity and secular humanism?
Increasingly the country is divided because of these issues and I believe is losing its national identity and suffering from what can be described as a multiple personality disorder. It remains to be seen what dominant if any personality emerges over time, but so far I’m not liking what I’m seeing